Thursday, January 28, 2010

Its Time For an Update!


Hello my friends. I have started this post with the pictures of the durian I enjoyed last Sunday! I actually had two! But I did not eat quite a bit of it, because me stomach was to stuffed. ALSO, in bigger news, MY LITTLE SISTER ATE TWO PODS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She, just like the rest of my family, used to HATE the smell. She said that it used to make her nauseated and gave her a head ache. Now, since I have been eating them in our apartment with her here for a few months, the smell no longer affects her. So I got her to taste one and she loved it!!! It may have been the most exciting moment of my entire week. She is going to have her own this Sunday. I still just can not even believe it. IN other food news, I am officially a food snob. I bought a box of organic bananas, that are ripening still, and I will only eat organic fruit. I have had two orange nights, which have been so lovely. These are called Cara Cara oranges! They are beautiful and pink and so tasty!<
As for life, I have been thinking allot as of late, as to what I want to be doing with myself when my yoga teacher training is over. I have been pretty much promoted to supervisor at my restaurant job, but this is mostly due to my large arsenal of cooking knowledge(all of which was acquired by watching the food network) and my obsessive view on cleaning. It feels strange to be good at something that I am no longer passionate about. I am glad that they value me there. And usually that ego stroke would be enough to convince me to sign my life away, and to pledge my allegiance to the restaurant. But that is just not the case any more. I must of matured something serious! I enjoy the physical nature of my job, and I love the team aspect, but I am un-satisfied on an intellectual level. And I just have this burning desire to really be of impact whilst I am here on earth. Life really is a gift, and I just want to milk it for all it is worth by contributing all that I can. There is just not a whole lot of room for me to go anywhere past where I am already in the restaurant industry. I have been happily reading my required course material with my Yoga Teacher Training. I feel like I learn something new each day about human nature, and how yoga works with it, not against it, but in a way to help people move forward, not feel badly about themselves because they were made aware of their short comings. Yes that was my wink and nudge towards organized religion, but enough of that for today. So, I was researching options for me, come the summer time, and I had quite a few. There is a fruit farm in Hawaii that I could go and live and work on. There is WWOOFing, which would be an amazing travel opportunity. There is joining a friend as she potentially journeys to Australia, and just working for a year. All of those options sound really really fun, but after thinking about it, I know I would just feel like I am taking one more year out of my life, not doing what I ultimately want to be doing, which is helping people. I don't know if it is just because I am turning 21 or what, but I really am feeling that I need to start my life's work. So after thinking quite a bit, the year abroad is ruled out. I know my sister and my mom are very likely going to be re-locating to Vancouver come the summer, and I really want to go with them. So Vancouver is the place. I would miss them way to much, and feel to left out if they moved and set up shop together next year and I was off some place else. So as for the what of my life, I was struggling with How I was going to help people. My mom and I have discussed opening a place together, where I would teach yoga, and she would life coach. She is currently learning so much in the Martha Beck Life Coaching course. And while I believe whole heatedly that yoga touches lives, I still want more. I see myself having one on one contact with people. Looking at what I like, I came down to Life Coaching myself, which I can start in June, as I finish my Yoga Teacher Training, or become a nature path. I want to be a life coach. I will already be dealing with peoples physical selves with yoga, and my nutritionist diploma (tee hee, betcha didn't know I had that did you!?), and the helping people find their right lives, sounds like a plan to me! SO, all in all, I will be moving to Vancouver this summer, starting to teach Yoga, and commencing Life Coaching training with Martha Beck!! Hazza!
Here is a picture of my beautiful sister, and the indispensable Chelsea, along with her overly generous birthday gifts for me!
We all went to Health Fare(the place I work) for lunch this week. I learned that I just like sweet fruit. I had a bowl of tomatoes, cucumbers, peppers and lettuce. (I know, I know, not fruit... I didn't even like it boooo!) And I think I am just over it. I will be posting again soon. I have much to say. This was just a logistical up date, more philosophical to come later.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Don't Worry! It's mostly photos!!


Good day all web-surfers and blog devour-ers! I am looking out of my window right now and all the white is reminding me that it is winter!! This week has literally flown by, with out my noticing. It was my first work week as you know, and it was an interesting one. I have made some discoveries. First thing I notice, is that all kitchens are eerily similar to one another. I suppose there is a system that works, and so people abide by it. And it seems to me that the kitchen attracts a certain group of people as well. The meticulous boss is for sure a standard fixture. I also realized that I do not want to own my own restaurant. I don't know, there is just something about the work it takes to work overtime in a restaurant, let alone being in CHARGE of all the things that go on, that does not resonate with me. It is a strange feeling to no longer really really love something I used to really really love. It seems my perspective on food is once again going through a metamorphosis. I used to really value the artistry of cooking and preparing food. I used to think it was so wonderful to mix, add to, take away from, arrange and re-arrange food. Now, it all just looks dull. Like all the things we do to food removes its vibrancy step by step. It is almost like cooking is an attempt to cover up some sort of fatal flaw that lies in raw food! I think as I am transitioning to my fruitarian life style, I am seeing raw fruits as perfection in food, and everything else, is just steps away from that perfection. I still love to companionship in the kitchen...some times. I feel this will very shortly become something that I ride out until my yoga teacher training is over, and I get to move. My sister and I are most likely going to be up rooting from the harsh winds of Southern Alberta to the flowery, green and wet streets of Vancouver!! This is a move I have dreamt of for years, and now, it is looking as though it is going to happen! Updates to follow, fear not.

On my own food front this week, things were a tad of a rough go. It is not because I had a desire to eat anything that was not fruit. It is strange to me, how once I make up my mind about something, all temptation to veer from the path disintegrates. No, it was because of the quality of my conventionally grown produce. It just was not very good. It was obviously picked to early, over treated with chemicals and improperly transported and stored. So my new rule, only organic. This is just something I know I have to do to maintain my health, and my enjoyment. And of course there is the issue of sustainable farming, less impact on our earth, and a smaller carbon foot print to spur me on as well. I generally like to stick with mono-days, of eating just one type of fruit in a day. This is because I know my poor little digestive system is so beyond burnt out, and I would like to be as gentle as I can. And this is fine, as long as the fruit is good. This week saw a myriad of oranges, apples and bananas. All of which were disappointing to a degree. But fear not! I have purchased my very own BOX full of organic bananas which are in the process of ripening as we speak! So this problem is very rapidly becoming a thing of the past.

Yesterday my father arrived from Red Deer, to spend time with my sister and to celebrate my up coming twenty first birthday!!! It was so nice to see him
We went out to a little vegan place to eat, because I thought I could order a Greek salad, without the feta, olives or dressing, and extra tomato! I was partially correct, but did end up eating some romaine lettuce, other wise I would have had a half a tomato and a half a bell pepper... So I suppose I "broke" my frutairan rule, but, I figure a little lettuce never hurt anyoneThat is my wee sister Sammi, and my papah!! This is a picture of my salad, I left the onions for the winter mice!.
Finally, after our little trip out, we came home and watched Public Enemies. Well, slightly more honestly, my dad and me sister watched Public Enemies, I surfed the web for blogs! And I ate oranges.Alas, farewell on this day readers, I will be back tomorrow for more insight and DURIAN DAY!!!!

Monday, January 18, 2010


Hello one and all! Yesterday was Sunday, and thus, it was d-day. What is d-day you ask? D-day is my weekly indulgence day. I buy one, gigantic, durian, and this is my feast for the day! Yesterday, my Durian was sooooo creamy, so rich, so soft, so ripe. It tasted of vanilla and caramel and banana and custard. It was heavenly. Generally, I avoide the "super stuffed" feeling when I am eating, but for durain, the subsequent 20 minutes of pain are well worth it. I just love love love durian. It is my food obsession. During the week, I will always have moments of thinking that I smell some durian, or can taste it in my mouth. Ok, enough with my un-healthy affection for an inadiment object, on we go.

Last night also marked the wrap up of my first weekend of yoga teacher training. It was ASTOUNDINGLY different than I though it would be. Basically, the mirror of my spirit was held up to my face, and it was a rather un-pleasant reflection staring back at me. I realized that the nature of any amazing teacher is one of, patience, enthusiasm, grace, poise, and most importantly an amazingly generous spirit. Teachers are basically mooched off of all day long, everyday. I mean, think about it, they are giving information, encouragement, support and love all the time, in order to maximise their students learning potential. That is a huge call. I found out this weekend, that I am rather selfish with information. I feel annoyed when people ask me questions, like they should really be trying to figure it out themselves. I do not feel a burning desire to help people, mostly I feel bombarded by peoples need, and want to retreat. I am frustrated with people easily. I know that this program is really going to help me face these facts and over come them. I see myself as the loving, supportive, generous teacher, I am just not there yet. Also, I noticed that I am so used to learning passively. It has been a long time since I have actually let myself really care about anything. But I want to be enthusiastic about all the little details of yoga. So I am really going to have to let my guard down, and allow myself to be submerged in this training, not just floating above it, only 70% engaged and present. This will take work, but I have a feeling that this is why I was lead to this course.

And my last thing to jabber on endlessly about is how my first day at work went! It was so fantastic! I work at a place called Health Fare, here in Edmonton. ( It is working toward a healthier fare than most take out places. Lost of veg, brown rice, whole wheat flour, and even FRUIT!! I tell you what, you could do a lot worse. I had forgotten how much I adore working in kitchens. The whole set up is something that really resonates with me. We are all active all day, there is no sitting around on a computer, or just sitting around being bored. We all work as a team to get everything done. We are actually literally working together, and I love that. There is rotation of tasks, you are never stuck doing the same thing for more than an hour, which is really good for my over-active brain. And there is a sense of being generous, and giving to the community of people who come in. We are providing nourishment, all be it not the nourishment I would eat, but still nourishment none the less, even if it is just in the love that we all put into the food we make for them. This place is also IMMACULATELY clean, and laid back. There is such a great energy and work ethic. If you live in Edmonton, you must come and see!
Alas, I must go forage for some bananas! Untill next time!!

Friday, January 15, 2010

Post number one!! Welcome to my life!

Welcome... Ok, now is the time for me to come clean, I am very very poor at introductions. Once I get started and rolling, I can write up a storm, its just the getting started and the getting rolling part I have a hard time with. Today, I had my first day of yoga teacher training. It was a long day, nine hours to be exact. It was good, and kinda hard. I think that it will be a good thing for me, I just need to get adjusted. How did I get all the way to yoga teacher training you may ask? And what does that have to do with being a frutarian, or a cook? AH! Well I am so glad that you asked. I will tell you. I have had a stomach ache my whole life. (I promise that this is tieing things together, not just a random side note, bare with me) I also developed a poor habit of eating my feelings. By the time grade eight rolled around, I was about thirty pounds over weight and spending 3/4 of my time on the couch, with a stomach ache or a head ache or a chest cough, and also my trusty BOX of cookies. Digestive were my fav, just in case you are wondering. So then, in grade nine, I went on the high protein diet, and I lost twenty pounds, and I started working out. So I was feeling better, but the stomach aches persisted. I was eating better, but I was still dealing with a bit of over eating. I would be really good for a few days, with only meat and veggies, and then I would break down and eat 1/2 a loaf of banana bread with a fork, standing at the counter in a dark kitchen. It was around this time that I really got into baking and cooking. I was trying to make "lower carb, healthier" versions of the baked carbs I craved so much. Then in grade eleven, I came across the raw foods diet. I asked my mom if I could go on it, and she said now, I was a Type O blood type, and they need meat. At this time I was on a steady stream of protein bars and rice flour cookies. I wanted to be a vegetarian, but that was a no go. The grade elven blood drive came along around this time, only to reveal that I was a blood type Ae!! I went vegan overnight. The stomach aches were persistent and consistent, and I was finding it harder and harder to keep living a semi-normal life. In the summer I read a book called "raw foods real world" and I was done eating cooked food. This went along just fine for me until half way through grade twelve. I graduated early and jetted of to New Zealand for YWAM (Youth With A Mission) Long story short, It was very very hard, and I was made to feel VERY bad about my diet. The following year I plummeted into anorexia, and bottomed out at around 84 pounds. I also got a job at a little ready made meal market called Plate It Up! And it was fantastic! I was permanently in love with cooking, and grappling with an eating disorder to recover from. I spent the next year of my life TOTALLY miserable, gaining weight, off and on eating cooked food and just generally hating my life. And just like the first time, about eight months ago, I decided I would commit to raw foods, once and for all. I had familial permission, so long as I was eating enough, they did not care what it was I was eating. And thus, a happy compromise. There was one two month incident where I incorporated copious amounts of protein powder, as I was told this was of vital importance in my diet. I swelled like a balloon, and my skin turned yellow, so that was a short lived experiment. Being back on raw foods was a God send after those months of plight. My stomach aches dissipated, I had renewed energy, and I was actually enjoying my food again. Bu there was still a Small glitch in the works. I had transitioned to an 80/10/10 lifestyle, but was still spending allot of my time making substitution recipes for my friends and family. By this, I mean raw desserts. I had been making three desserts a week since I had gotten back from my trip to New Zealand in 2007. And while I would never actually sit down to a piece of anything I made, I still ate just enough of the batter of whatever I was making to feel ill. There was a special place in my over indulging heart for dates. It was time for yet another transition. So here we are. I have been fully raw for the last eight months, yet still indulging in heavy, fatty desserts. Now, I am dessert free. I will be eating simply, mono fruit days, with the occasional zucchini pasta with tomato. (Both are botanical a fruit, and there fore, REALLY easy on my digestion) I have always gravitated towards this simple way of eating, yet I just had to many addictions in my way before. Now, I feel free. I feel that not having to make the raw desserts any more was the last thing I needed to reach my hearts and bodies desire for ease. Now, here is the kicker. Whilst I was ill, I started to get really heavy into yoga. Yoga may seem like just a series of postures, a form of working out, (hum, mysterious that an anorexic would be drawn to that...) But in reality it is a practice of connecting with the body. To stop all the delusion of physical punishment as being something other than what it really is, destruction of the temple I am blessed by God to have. So through this time, I have decided that I want to take this path of yoga deeper, and become a teacher. So that is what I will be doing one weekend a month, for the next six months. And my day job... I am a cook! That is right. I have no desire what so ever to eat any cooked food, but I still love to prepare it. So, I am the fruitarian cook. I will be documenting my journey as a contraryan here, on this blog. I will post my meals, maybe my work outs, event of the day, photos and what ever else I feel has merit. And that is that! So please join me, as I venture to see what it is like for a young frutarian yogi, in a world of smoke and fire!